Long Black Train

Long black train - Josh Turner

I stopped at a gas station during my trip from Missouri. I drove from Missouri. Then through Texas, to see and be reunited with my son. And back to California to finish some unfinished business.

I came full circle on this long journey. Not only a long journey of driving, geographically. But a very long journey in my life, my heart, soul, and my mind.

From being at bible College in 1999-2003, when I was just out of high school. Then becoming a deputy sheriff in California. To being removed from my career in 2017, due to severe PTSD and depression.

This was followed by a few years of being estranged from my son, being on drugs and being homeless. Then being rescued by some people, (by God through them), and taken to a treatment and therapy center. A place that specialized in therapy for first responders and ptsd.

Driving through California today i stopped for gas.. While in the bathroom at the gas station a song came on. "Long Black Train", by Josh Turner.

I used to sing this song at karaoke bars. Specifically during the time I had lost my Career, was very depressed, and just starting to use drugs.

I always sang this song. Although my life was in shambles and I was a mess, I would sing this.

It was my worship to God. I sang it because, despite how low I was in my life, I knew there was, and is, Victory in God. I believe I sang it because it was a reminder. A reminder that even amidst the darkness I was in, God could save me. Singing it was both a reminder and a declaration. Declaring the words of the chorus, "Victory in the Lord".

As I heard the song today it was like God saying, "Remember this Shiloh? I heard you. And all of hell heard you too. And here you are. Victory in the Lord!!!

Even at the bars, when I would finish singing the song, almost the entire bar would yell, cheer, and clap. They celebrated it. Many would stand and thank me for singing it.

It reminds me now of how the Bible says, "Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses [who by faith have testified to the truth of God’s absolute faithfulness], stripping off every unnecessary weight and the sin which so easily and cleverly entangles us, let us run with endurance and active persistence the race that is set before us,"

Hebrews 12:1 AMP

It took me a while. It was a journey stripping off the many of the weights that easily entangled me. Or I should say, allowing God to strip them off of me. But He did it. And like the crowd in the bars I am, we all are, surrounded by a great cloud of heavenly souls.

The souls who have passed on before us, but are cheering, watching, and encouraging us. We can do it. No matter how dark, how devastating, how destructive anything looks, or feels, WE CAN MAKE IT. WE CAN DO IT. THERE IS, not just surviving, but VICTORY! IN THE LORD!