Who am I?
The important questions in life are not, "who do I want to be" or "what should I do (accomplish)?"; the important question is, "who am I"?
I believe this may be the core internal question within all human consciousness; "Who am I?"
The slow and compounding revelation of this answer most often unveils itself as we experience, and then recognize, who we are not.
There are two modes (driving forces) by which a person pursues the answers to this question: one is through fear (worry and angst), the other is through peace.
On a superficial level, the more conscious question that sits in the minds of individuals, creating an internal agony so long as it remains unanswered, is this; "what is it that I should do in life?". Yet, this question can never be confidently answered until we begin to answer the deeper core question of, "who am I?".
Considering the concept (which I profess to be true) that we are both divine and human, spirit and ego (flesh), yet most of our egos are unaware of this truth, it makes sense that the ego would be wondering, "what do I want to be'', or, "what is it that I should do in this life?"
The answer for the ego lies in the discovery of its counterpart - the source of its existence: spirit. If spirit is the source and true identity from which our egoic selves have emerged, then it is of most importance for the ego to first answer the question, "who am I?". Of which the answer would be, "you are an offshoot of spirit in a material realm."
Our egoic and material selves are nothing without spirit. Without spirit these parts of us (our flesh) would not exist. As it is, these parts of us only exist temporarily.
When the eternal source of our being, spirit, is recognized, and its identity discovered, then the egoic and temporal questions regarding tasks, pursuits, purpose, meaning, and desires will more easily be understood.
The first step toward these important discoveries of ourselves, and the answers to these questions, is peace. Our ego can become distraught, anxious, and worried as the external societal pressures of achieving, attaining, and doing rise up within our minds like a cruel taskmaster. We believe that these pressures of achievement are our God-given duty. And perhaps they are, but from what god?
When the ego (flesh; our human selves) decides to no longer be a slave to the tyrannical god of the mind (and the superficiality of society - aka, "the god of this world"), and instead lays down all pressures of "becoming, doing, and achieving", it then has the opportunity to stop its "rat-race" pursuits and begin to connect with its spirit; aka "entering His rest".
The ego can begin to experience peace when it recognizes that it has no true identity without spirit. And, if no true identity exists without spirit, then "doing" or "becoming" anything, without spirit, is also futile. Peace (rest) is the place where ego and spirit connect. The spirit is always at peace, and always knows. The ego attains this peace when it allows itself to let go of striving, needing, and desiring. When the ego embraces the spirit as its shepherd, and itself as a lamb (helpless and purposeless without spirit), then the ego can rest in peace.
From this place of peace and connection with its spirit, the ego has exhaustingly laid down the old mindset of "being something, achieving, conquering and desiring", and says of spirit; "You are my truest identity. I don't exist without you. I will allow you to lead me, and take care of me. You comfort me and protect me. I only need to be where you guide me, I only need to have what you bring to me. Nothing is real compared to you. Nothing is worth having in comparison to your presence and your peace." (See psalm 23).
From the place of egoic surrender, the ego can find peace as it connects with its Shepherd (spirit). The ego then discovers that it is one with the spirit. The shepherd would not be a shepherd if there were no sheep to tend, and sheep without a shepherd are merely food for wild beasts. But together, the spirit and ego, the shepherd and sheep are One. The shepherd (spirit) knows it plans for the sheep (ego), and will guide the ego through life. All the questions of "what should I be; what should I do; what is my purpose; what is my worth" are all answered within the superior mind and wisdom of the shepherd (spirit).
There is a plan, a purpose, a usefulness, and even an identity for the ego. But, it is only fully known, understood, and accomplished with the guidance and wisdom of the shepherd (spirit).
So, "who am I?" I am the Lord's (spirit's; shepherd's) lamb. The spirit is my shepherd. We are one, a unified identity. Therefore, I am ego, and I am spirit. I, the lamb (ego), am becoming whatever the spirit (shepherd) knows I need to become. The shepherd (spirit) is manifesting its purpose, will, intentions, and desires through me. The shepherd is good, kind, loving, patient, and wise. I (ego) walk with, and daily choose to be one with, spirit. Therefore, I am good, kind, loving, patient, and wise. I achieve whatever the spirit leads me to achieve, I pursue whatever the spirit points me to, and I stop, rest, and lie down often, because this is the rest and the peaceful promise of my shepherd.
Our ego does not have to be under the rule of the tyrannical, fast-paced, "doing lots, but achieving little" society. The spirit is peace; Become peace. The spirit is love; Become love. You are not just an egoic-human made of flesh, you derive from spirit. Be one with spirit. (John 15 & 17).
So, who are you?
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